Almost exactly two years ago, I got married for the second time. May 28, 2015 was one of the most amazing days of my life and the word that was touted on that day was the word redemption. The bad was being redeemed. Joy filled the walls of the rustic barn where we said our vows and then we were off to seven of the most fun filled, exciting, relaxing heavenly days in Hawaii. However, it didn’t take too long for the word redemption in relation to my new marriage to feel not quite so redemptionish.
When was the last time you cheered someone on — no strings attached? Just because you genuinely wanted another person to achieve her very best?
When was the last time you applauded for someone, without privately wondering how you measure up in comparison? Without harboring inner resentment or jealousy because your friend was in position or place of authority you wished was yours.
When was the last time you genuinely wanted the best for someone else without regard to how it compares to your ‘success’ or lack thereof?
And, friends, cheering on your children doesn’t count.
Is there a way for me to find true satisfaction? Deep down?
I don’t know how long other people hold onto the ashes of their loved ones, but I held onto them for a long time. Four years and three months, to be exact. Over the years, I have dished out a teaspoon here and a tablespoon there, while camping or hiking or on birthdays, but I never really could get to the place where I could really let go of them.
You guys — I recently discovered a new candidate for the mother of all four-letter words. This one is a doozy. No record label is going to slap the word EXPLICIT on anyone’s album because it’s in the lyric, but I’m telling you, its sneaky, subtle savvy is dangerous.
This word has nothing to do with unmentionable things or behaviors and everything to do with our view of ourselves and ultimately, if I may be so bold, of the God who created us for a purpose.
This four-letter word is capable of belittling so many people, not the least of which is me.
TV shows be darned…they still have a hold on me even after all these years of Netflix options, Hulu binge-watching, and Apple TV-palooza. Bottom line? Hollywood still has my number. Case in point: last nights’ episode of This Is Us – the complex, character-driven, 1-hour drama that has taken my Tuesday night by storm in theContinue reading “This is Us – and This is Tough!”
Here is my family . . . in the picture above. If you would have asked me a couple months ago, “Do you find your identity in your kids?” I would have said, “Of course, not! I know I shouldn’t do that.” Or I might have said, “I totally know who I am without my kids.” But then . . .
My mom always used to say, about parenting us girls, that she loved each year more than the previous. She swore parenting just got better and better as we got older.
All I have to say is, we must’ve been some angels! Or time has blurred the reality of how it all went down because, in my experience, these years of mothering teens and pre-teens has been some of the trickiest to date. And that’s saying something because I was a hot mess when the kids were babies. In those days, Scott would barely walk in the door from work and I was already throwing the parenting baton like a flaming hot potato at his face. “Your turn,” I’d declare. “I’m tapping out!”
Although the ticking of the clock can often be scary as we march on towards the end of life, maybe it graciously brings much-needed perspective as well. Time has a way of softening certain memories. Of showing us how we are capable of walking through hard things and reminding us, this too shall pass.
…”And, as if stamping it into her life for the New Year and certainly with the desire for this to be emboldened on her heart. She whispers it: This moment is okay. This is real. Right here. And I am not in charge.”
WHAT we are named is not as important as THAT we are named.